


Oblivious

by MadsRead



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Athlete Kara Danvers, F/F, Lena Luthor-centric, Minor Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, Slow Burn Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Tutor Lena Luthor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:48:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23761078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadsRead/pseuds/MadsRead
Summary: AU where Kara is a star soccer player and after a difficult semester is forced into tutoring to keep her spot on the team, and that tutor turns out to be none other than Lena Luthor. Neither of them are happy about the arrangement, or at least, neither of them will admit to it.
Relationships: Kara Danvers & Lena Luthor, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 15
Kudos: 147





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time posting anything that I've written, and I'm not totally sure where it's going, but I hope someone else enjoys it too! Let me know what you think and if anything needs to be corrected!

It's only the second day of her sophomore year and Lena has already had it with two of her instructors and the fact that they like to assume all of their students are incompetent. Truthfully, Lena's education with her tutors growing up had been far more advanced than any class she'd taken since she came to the university, but she had seen a chance to move four hours from home and jumped at it, so she probably shouldn't complain. After nearly falling asleep in her physics class, she silently berated herself for staying up half the night to finish the book she was reading as she ordered a coffee on her way to the tutoring center to get her assignment for the semester. Fifteen minutes later, Lena was staring blankly at the two names in the envelopes she had been given--this had to be some kind of sick joke. But no matter how many times she blinked and rubbed her eyes or put the envelope away just to pull it out again, the names remained the same. Kara Danvers and Leslie Willis. She groaned loudly. 

"Well that doesn't sound promising," Jack laughed from behind her, making her jump, "doesn't really make me want to open my assignment."

"May the odds be ever in your favor," Lena grumbled, looking at him expectantly. Jack rolled his eyes at the way she crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow, reminding him eerily of his own mother. 

"Finally finish those books then?" Jack snorted. 

"Last night," Lena nodded, she knew how badly her friends were going to make fun of her for blowing through the fictional books that everyone else her age had read in middle school and high school, but she had been deprived of reading for fun her entire childhood, and she wasn't going to let them stop her now. 

"I honestly can't believe your parents just _didn't_ let you read."

"Well they did," Lena pointed out, "just not for fun. They said wasting time on young adult novels was beneath me when I had access to first editions to literary masterpieces. I read all the time, I just didn't get to read what everyone else my age did." 

"You live a sad life, Miss Luthor," he replied with an eye roll. 

"Don't I know it," Lena snorted. "I have _two_ , not one, _two_ soccer players this semester," she huffed. 

"Oh no, here we go," Jess groaned as she joined them. "You aren't going to subject us to your rant about how they're treated like goddesses and gifted passing grades just to earn the school money and how if universities put half as much stock in their academics as they do in sports, we'd all be better off, are you? Because I love you and I totally agree, but I'm about ready to give you a word limit." 

"You're an ass, and no, I'm not going to rant. I'm going to chug an obscene amount of caffeine and go do all of my assignments that are already available for the first month of classes so that I can focus on anything but busywork for the rest of the semester," Lena grumbled. 

"Don't you just love our little ray of sunshine?" Jess replied in a falsely sweet tone, giving them a huge smile and pointing towards Lena as if she were a prize on a gameshow. 

"Get your assignment and let's go," Jack urged with a laugh, rolling his eyes at Jess as he put an arm around Lena's shoulders.

* * *

Despite her dedication to finishing all of her schoolwork for the next month during the first week so that she wouldn't have to worry about it anymore, Lena found herself sitting around Jack's coffee table two hours later, all three of them taking a shot of something vile before simultaneously shooting off the perfunctory 'Hi, I'm going to be your tutor for the semester. We're required to meet this week to set a foundation, so let me know your availability.' text. 

"Tell me this semester will fly by, please?" Lena groaned, throwing herself backwards on the floor.

"Whatever you need to tell yourself, princess," Jack teased. "At least you got paired with women, I have Morgan-fucking-Edge." 

"Well they weren't going to give him to a female tutor," Jess pointed out with a slightly horrified look on her face, "really, you should have seen that coming."

"I have a feeling he'd be more receptive of Lena," Jack pointed out, giving the raven-haired woman a hopeful look. "He's always checking her out." 

"Jacky, for the last time, no way in hell am I switching with you. My assignments might be terrible, but at least I don't have to worry about them making a pass at me," Lena replied, swiftly shutting that idea down. "Plus, Edge makes comments about my chest that make me _extremely_ uncomfortable every time he sees me. I couldn't deal with that all semester." 

"Didn't he try to grope you at a party last year?" Jess asked, furrowing her brow in a way that told Lena she was trying to remember something that happened when she was drunk.

"He _did_ grope me at a party last year. He's disgusting," Lena scoffed, then instantly rolled her eyes at the notification that popped up on her phone, showing a text from Kara. "Great. Apparently Danvers communicates primarily through emojis." 

"So do you when you're drunk," Jess pointed out. 

"Well, she replied within ten minutes, maybe she'll at least be punctual," Jack offered, but Lena just glared at him for trying to be positive while she just wanted to feel sorry for herself. 

"She wants to meet _tomorrow_ ," Lena whined. "I thought I'd have at least a couple days before I had to deal with them." 

"Maybe it'll be better to space them out?" Jess offered. "At least yours isn't a freshman. How can you be in the first week of first semester of your freshman year and _already_ need a tutor?"

"Maybe you'll get lucky and it's just some kid trying to be preemptive," Jack shrugged.

* * *

When Lena's alarm went off the next day, she immediately groaned at the thought of being stuck in a room alone with Kara Danvers for at least half an hour even though she had a good twelve hours before she had to worry about that. She dragged herself to class, stopping to buy a coffee that day, and when she spotted a certain bright-eyed blonde a few rows down from her in lecture, she wondered if she should tell her that she was going to be the one tutoring her that semester. She decided to save that for a future-Lena that was well caffeinated and more equipped for tolerating judgmental athletes. 

**"I have room 103 in the tutoring center."** Lena texted shortly once she had gotten to the room and set out her laptop to pass the time with homework, knowing Kara wasn't due to show up for another fifteen minutes, and to be honest, she didn't exactly expect her to be on time. 

"Oh, Lena," Kara said awkwardly when she walked into the room only three minutes later and saw the raven-haired woman sitting at the desk. "Are--are you my tutor?"

"Yep," Lena said flatly. "You know my name?"

"You realize we've had classes together since first semester here?" Kara laughed, raising an eyebrow at the shorter woman, causing a blush to rise over Lena's cheeks.

"I did. I didn't think _you_ did," Lena admitted, unsure why this woman had the ability to make her flustered so quickly. 

"Dude, you're a _Luthor_. Everyone knows when they have a class with you," Kara snorted. 

"You can ask for reassignment if you want, won't hurt my feelings," Lena snapped, looking back down at her computer to focus on her work at the mention of her last name. She wasn't sure why she was so set off by the blonde judging her by her last name given the fact that everyone did the same thing, but if she wasn't excited about this arrangement before, she was flat out pissed off about it now. 

"No! No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I know you're more than your name, Lena, I don't have any negative opinion of you just because of your family," Kara promised. "But you do have a widely known name and everyone is very aware when your name is called during roll. My point was only that it's impossible not to notice you." Lena couldn't quite put a finger on why she believed this girl was sincere, but she offered her a weak smile and gestured to the seat in front of her. 

"The class you're having trouble in is chem, then?" Lena asked, hoping that they could have an unspoken agreement to drop the topic of conversation revolving around her family, though she didn't know why she just assumed they would be on the same page considering they had both just come into the meeting with what might not be the most accurate opinions of each other. But Kara sat down with a wide smile and pulled out a notebook and pen, looking up at Lena with intensely focused eyes. 

The rest of the meeting went better than she had expected it to--Lena had laid out some ground rules about putting in the work instead of slacking off and expecting her to help as well as the list of rules that the university provided them with, and Kara just nodded along happily, writing down anything she thought she might forget. They settled on a time, Tuesday nights at 7, and by the end, Lena wasn't sure whether she hated the blonde for completely defying every one of her expectations, or if she was actually relieved that she had been assigned to Kara. 

"So," Lena said with a sigh just as she got ready to pack up, "you obviously know about my family drama. I usually let the people I'm tutoring ask any questions they have during the first meeting. I don't want my last name to be a distraction for you, and I don't want to waste my time tutoring someone knowing that they're just looking at me and wondering if I'm going to snap at any second like my brother did. I find it more productive to just address it up front. I won't promise to answer anything, but I'll answer what I can." 

Kara hesitated for a minute, looking up into very tired green eyes, and asked the one question that Lena had never heard follow her little rant. "I know your brother escaped this summer, I know that had to have been hard. Lena, are--are you okay?"

"I--what?" Lena stuttered. 

"Are you okay?" Kara repeated as if it were the only question that could possibly follow. 

"I'm--yeah. My brother is a fucking lunatic, but he's back in prison now, so I can go about my life. I'm fine," Lena shrugged. 

"Good," Kara replied with a small smile. 

"That's-- _that's it_?" Lena questioned in surprise. 

"Well that's all I really care about the situation, so yeah," Kara shrugged. "So we're good? Because I'm starving." 

Lena just nodded blankly, pretending to look back at her computer screen, which had long since gone dark, but she refused to let Kara see how shocked she was by the fact that instead of grilling her about her family drama, she had sincerely asked about Lena's wellbeing. Even when she gave her friends a free pass to ask questions about her family, they had been inquisitive, thought respectful, they had had wanted to know more about her brother and whether he had always been crazy and about how her father died or whether her mother was still supportive of her brother. Her friends had never stopped to ask solely about her and her wellbeing, but this woman that had never spoken to her had only had one question, and it was about her. Absently, Lena packed up her things and before she even registered where she was going and how she got there, she was back in her bed, still fully clothed with one question ringing in her ears: ' _Lena, are you okay_?'


	2. Chapter 2

For the second morning in a row, Lena groaned loudly when her alarm clock went off, and she absently wondering if this reaction for the past two days was any indication of how her semester was going to go, but she could only pray that it wasn't. She lasted only about three minutes before her thoughts wandered to the irritatingly difficult to read blonde that she had sat across from last night and the sincere concern in her voice when she had asked about Lena's wellbeing. She let out an embarrassing whimper at the mind fuck that was Kara Danvers before harshly correcting herself. A noise like that should _never_ escape a Luthor's mouth. As she slipped into the shower, she rolled her eyes at herself--she spent half of her time trying to prove she wasn't really a Luthor and the other half reminding herself to act like a Luthor. So maybe Kara wasn't the only one of them that was a total basket case. 

When the raven haired Luthor slipped into her seat, ten minutes early for her 8 a.m. chemistry lecture that would inevitably bore her back to sleep, she took solace in the fact that at least no one would dare sit next to Lena Luthor by choice and sipped peacefully on her coffee. That is, until Kara came in at a surprising seven minutes early and made a beeline straight for her with a smile. _No, no, don't you fucking do it_ , Lena's mind hissed, but Kara sat down right next to her with a wide smile. Lena just looked at her incredulously. Why on earth had the _one student_ that Lena couldn't completely predict decided that today should be the day that Lena didn't sit alone? Why did it have to be the infuriatingly beautiful blonde that seemed to be oblivious to all of the walls that she had so carefully erected?

"What are you doing?" Lena asked dumbly, currently so irritated by the fact that Kara had infiltrated her mind all morning that she didn't care if she came off as crass. 

"Well, chemistry starts in six minutes, so I'm sitting?" Kara replied with a raise of her eyebrow that made Lena wonder whether she was teasing or not. She honestly could never tell with this woman. Lena just rolled her eyes in response, refusing to let Kara see her get flustered, though she was quick to remind herself that she shouldn't be flustered by Kara at all. She didn't even like athletes. "Anyone ever tell you you're not a morning person?" Kara said teasingly, jerking Lena from her thoughts. 

"I am, actually," Lena said flatly, taking another sip of her coffee. 

"Well I'm sure you're just a _joy_ the rest of the day, then," Kara snorted, obviously having thought Lena was joking. 

"You don't have to sit by me," Lena reminded sharply. 

"I like sitting by you," Kara shrugged and Lena's eyes went wide. "Yeah, then it won't look suspicious when I sit next to you during a test to cheat."

"You _will not_!" Lena hissed, "I am your _tutor_ , not--" 

"Lena, it was a joke," Kara interrupted quickly with a giggle. "I'm sorry, I didn't think that would get such a reaction out of you! I don't need to cheat, geez."

"You obviously need a tutor," Lena snapped, and Kara's face fell. 

"Maybe I need help, but I don't need the answers. I'm not an idiot," Kara responded in a much less giddy tone. "And I like sitting beside you because you're not hitting on me or trying to make friends with me, which means I don't have to go through the headache of trying to decide whether you're actually nice or just trying to get something out of me."

"Sorry," Lena mumbled, and immediately wondered why her first reaction was to calm the other woman and make sure her feelings weren't hurt when she knew she certainly wouldn't bother with anyone else. "You'd be surprised how many people hear my last name and are only nice to me to either get information or to get help in a class." 

"So we don't do that," Kara suggested, smile returning. 

"What?" Lena asked tiredly, already growing weary of the blonde's constant smile and upbeat attitude. 

"We don't expect anything from each other. You just sit there and be your reserved, grumpy self, and I will continue to sit by you to use your intimidation defense as a shield from everyone else. In return, I'll leave you alone and be the easiest tutoring assignment you've ever had," Kara offered. 

Lena didn't have time to voice her concerns over the idea, because the professor was already addressing the class, reminding them that he only had a 40% pass rate and if they hadn't started on their reading yet, they were already behind. If Lena hadn't already finished the first month's worth of assignments for his class, she might be worried, but his illusions of grandeur bothered Lena less than the fact that Kara was already doodling on a notepad instead of paying attention. She clenched her jaw and it took everything in her not to reprimand the blonde, deciding that if she was clueless at their first tutoring session, she would chew her out for it then. 

Surprisingly, by the time Lena made it to lunch with Jess and Jack, a full two classes and two hours later, her blood was still boiling over Kara's behavior in class that morning, and the pair could see it the second she sat down. 

"Who pissed in your cheerios?" Jack asked with a raised brow. 

"Twenty bucks says she says Kara Danvers!" Jess interrupted quickly with a little smirk. Lena glared at her in a way that let her know she had hit the nail on the head. "What did she do, Princess?"

"Again, I hate that nickname. But she fucking doodled all class! Not to mention the fact that she came and sat right beside me with her smug little smile that makes me want to punch her! But who actually wants to tutor someone that doesn't even pay attention the first week of class? And then there's the fact that I have no idea if she's joking or not ninety-five percent of the time she opens her damn mouth!" Lena fussed, and Jess and Jack shared a look that made Lena want to reach across the table to hit them, too. " _What_?"

"Nothing, babe, you just might have a little _tiny_ tendency to get worked up like this around pretty women," Jess pointed out. 

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Lena demanded, knowing she was a terribly unpleasant person today. 

"It's true," Jack shrugged. "It _is_ how we found out you were gay." 

"Okay, technically, _you_ didn't find out I was gay until Veronica _told_ you we were having sex. You actually spent half a semester flirting with me. Jess _might_ have found out because I was a mess because of Veronica," Lena corrected. 

"I just think if Kara looked like less of a badass goddess and more like a human being, you wouldn't be so flustered right now," Jess explained, giving Lena her please-don't-bite-my-head-off look. 

"You're ridiculous," Lena huffed, rolling her eyes.

* * *

Throughout the next day and the next morning, Lena maintained her stance--Jess was being ridiculous, Lena's frustration had nothing to do with the fact that Kara was absurdly hot. But then a blonde-haired, blue-eyed woman was bouncing towards her in their microbiology class wearing a fitted tank top, and when she shifted to set her book bag down, Lena could see every one of the muscles in her stomach ripple with the motion and she started to wonder. Sure, Kara was beautiful, she was tall, toned, and pretty, but there was no way that that was the reason Lena had had such a hard time keeping a level head around her, was it?

"Good morning, sunshine," Kara said as she sat down, and the smile she flashed her made Lena start mentally counting the days until the end of the semester. 

"Oh good, so you're one of those people that's perky _all_ day," Lena grumbled, refusing to crumble just because the irritating woman was attractive. 

"Well, someone has to make up for your general lack of personality," Kara snorted and Lena shot her a glare that shut her up quickly, even if it didn't wipe the smug smile off of her face. 

Lena spent the entire class resisting the urge to roll her eyes once again and wondered if there was potential for the blonde's close proximity to actually interfere with her studies once she realized she'd spent the past three days thinking more about how infuriating she was than actually listening to the lectures. Not that she needed the lectures, thankfully. About halfway through the class, Lena had the sinking realization that weekends would be her only off days where Kara was concerned. She had one class each day with the blonde, not to mention the hour and a half tutoring session once a week, and the weekends would be her only escape. She groaned audibly, making Kara raise an eyebrow at her in that ever-infuriating way that made Lena want to scream.

* * *

The weekend passed with more drinking than Lena would like to admit--certainly not to forget about a certain irritating blonde, though, it was definitely just for fun. Or that's what Lena told herself at least. But Lena found herself growing more and more anxious as the time ticked down to her tutoring session on Tuesday, and when she realized that she was in the room she had reserved for them a full hour early just waiting, she laughed at herself. Maybe going insane really did run in the family, she thought, because there is no way a sane person would do this to themselves for money that they didn't need. 

She resolved herself to working on assignments that wouldn't be due for another month and a half until the soccer player showed up, about ten minutes before they were meant to begin. 

"Oh crap, we did say 7:00, right? Not 6:30? Am I late?" Kara gaped, obviously stressed over the idea of being late in a way that made her just a little more relatable to Lena. Lena wasn't a fan. 

"No, no, you're fine. I just got here early to finish some work. Why don't we start with the homework assigned for the week? You can work through it and I can help as you go," Lena offered. 

"Oh, I've already done it," Kara shrugged. 

"Really?" Lena asked, and the lilt in her voice gave away her surprise. 

"You really think I'm an idiot, don't you?" Kara snorted, but didn't sound offended in the slightest. 

"No, Kara, I don't. I do think you need help in a class," Lena corrected, voice softer than Kara had ever heard it. 

"You can check it if you want?" Kara suggested. 

"Sure, yeah. Let me see," Lena agreed. 

The raven-haired woman was surprised to see that Kara had gotten every one of the problems exactly right without looking like she had had to correct anything or rework a single problem to find the right answer. As she stared blankly at the papers in her hands, she started to wonder how this girl had even ended up in the tutoring program and if this was all just a giant waste of her time. 

"You don't need a chemistry tutor..." Lena said finally, looking up at Kara with an arched brow. Kara blushed fiercely, which gave Lena more satisfaction than she'd like to admit. 

"No, I don't," Kara confessed. "I don't mean to waste your time, Lena, but this is mandatory for me and you're getting paid anyways, so I guess we're both stuck." 

"Why--if you don't need a tutor, then why?" Lena questioned. "You don't even pay attention in class and this is perfect." 

"I--can we leave it at personal reasons, please?" Kara asked carefully. "I had a very bad semester and I flunked this class. It was personal, not academic, and I really don't actually need the help. But this was the only way they'd let me stay on the team. The advisor comes by here every session to make sure I'm going, though, so I have to come." 

"Okay," Lena agreed. 

"Okay?" Kara questioned. "Okay as in I don't have to explain or okay as in we can keep up appearances?" 

"Both," Lena shrugged. "We'll come in here every week and we can both do homework or whatever. When they come by, it will still look like we're having a tutoring session; I'll still get paid and you'll stay on the team and no one needs to know. But I really mean _no one_ because if anyone finds out, we could both be in trouble."

"You know, you're making me a little dizzy," Kara admitted with a laugh. "I can't tell if you hate me or like me."

Well, that was abrupt, Lena thought--perceptive but abrupt. Lena had been wrestling with the same thing for days. This woman was absolutely infuriating sometimes--she had no regard for all of the walls Lena had put up, she had no problem entering Lena's personal space with a smile, she did that ridiculous eyebrow raise that made Lena's blood boil, and she was an athlete. But she was also beautiful and seemed genuinely kind and had asked Lena if she was okay the first time she had met her, which Lena still hadn't been able to put out of her mind. 

"Yeah, me neither," Lena replied, thinking maybe it would finally serve as a warning to the blonde to keep her at an arm's length, but Kara just laughed. She threw her head back and laughed as if Lena had told an amazing joke, then just nodded and Lena wasn't sure whether she should love her or hate her for it. "By the way, tell your teammate Leslie that if she doesn't schedule a meeting with me this week, I have to report her. I get that neither of us want to be there, but it's my job and I'm not risking getting fired for someone I don't know." 

"Note taken," Kara responded.

* * *

After two weeks of these meetings where Lena and Kara had started falling into easy conversation--no, Lena corrected herself, Kara had wormed her way into Lena's life, this wasn't just chance--Lena texted her group message once again, to talk about the blonde. 

**"I still can't decide if I hate her. It's been four weeks." -Lena**

**"I'm pathetic." -Lena**

**"What? Drooling over Kara again?" -Jess**

**"Oh, she drives me up the fucking wall! But she's so cute!" -Jack**

**"She is literally infuriating, have you seen that stupid thing she does with her eyebrow? But she asked if I slept well, why would she ask that? Are we supposed to be friends now?" -Jess**

**"Why does she have to have such a toned body? How am I supposed to concentrate with that right beside me? She's honestly infuriating!" -Jack**

**"I literally hate the both of you." -Lena**

**"I need it to get colder so that she'll stop wearing tank tops." -Lena**

**"You need to get laid." -Jess**

**"Aaaand this is where I tap out. I know better than to give input on Lena's sex life." -Jack**

**"That's because you're a smart man." -Lena**

* * *

"Hey, Lena!" Kara said excitedly when she ran into her tutor at a party the following weekend.

Lena's mouth went dry instantly as her eyes raked over the blonde. If Lena had been confused by the way she felt when Kara wore a tight tank top, the way she looked outside of class was utterly flabbergasting. Kara was wearing short black shorts that showed off her perfectly toned legs and one of the extremely tight soccer jerseys that were designated for parties--the jerseys were a staple at these parties, so Lena had seen them a hundred times and had always thought the way the athletes wore clothing that was two sizes too small and very intentionally ripped to show off cleavage and muscles was over-the-top and demeaning, she found that she suddenly had a new opinion of the tradition. 

"Lena?" Kara questioned, looking at the other woman with worried eyes. It wasn't until then that Lena realized she had completely forgotten to respond to Kara's greeting due to the war going on in her head. 

"Oh, Kara!" she quickly recovered. "Sorry, I almost didn't recognize you in that. I don't know that I've ever seen you with makeup on and your hair down." 

Kara laughed, giving Lena a sweet smile, and Lena was instantly terrified that the other woman knew about her infuriating attraction towards her. "Between you and me, I really hate dressing like this. I feel extremely exposed wearing this jersey. But I was in a bad place last year and apparently coming out with my teammates is the only way that they believe I'm doing better, and this is easier than having them grill me twenty-four-seven about how I'm doing," the blonde admitted. "Plus, my friends come to save me a few hours in, so I don't have to stay the whole time." 

"Lenaaaa!" Jess whined, running up to her friend, "come dance with me!"

"Um, are you _that_ drunk already? You are well aware that I don't dance," Lena snorted, and the raised eyebrow that Jess gave her quickly clued her into the fact that Jess was trying to offer her an escape from the soccer player. "Oh! Sorry. Jess, this is Kara; Kara, this is my friend Jess."

"Hi!" Kara said happily, smiling at Jess with that radiant smile that drove Lena up the wall. 

"Oh, hey!" Jess replied excitedly and Lena wondered if maybe she was a little buzzed. "You play outside mid, right?"

"I do!" Kara chirped, thankful for something within her comfort zone to talk about, but Lena looked at her friend with wide eyes and a conflicted expression. 

"I'm sorry, who the hell are you and since when do you know anything about sports?" Lena snorted. 

"I played soccer when I was younger," Jess shrugged. "I always loved the strategy of the game, I'm just astoundingly uncoordinated." 

"That makes it a little difficult, doesn't it?" Kara agreed with a laugh. 

Before either of them could get another word off, a large man threw his arms around Kara from behind, making her lean forward in a way that allowed Lena to see right down her shirt. Lena flushed fiercely and averted her eyes, refusing to admit that the jersey she had once hated was really doing something for her when a certain blonde wore it. 

"James!" Kara squealed with a laugh. "Did you come to save me? Tell me you came to save me!"

"Yes, Kar, I came to save you," James assured, rolling his eyes at her. "But this is by far the least miserable I've ever found you at one of these things." 

"My fault," Jess giggled, "I started talking about soccer."

"That'll do it," James agreed, "our girl can talk about soccer all day if you let her." He finally let go of Kara just to move to stand beside her and throw an arm over her shoulder. Lena cringed at how comfortably he touched her and she found her heart sinking when Kara leaned into him and wrapped her arms around his waist, cuddling into his side. "Ready to go, Dumplin'?"

Kara visibly blushed and Lena's heart sank further--not that she would ever admit that--as she gripped tightly to Jess's arm, giving Jess the signal to get her out of there. 

"Perfect timing, I need another drink, come with, Lena?" Jess asked, already pulling the raven-haired woman away. Lena completely missed the way Kara's face fell as she walked away and the way that she smacked James in the chest for calling her that in front of other people. 

Lena found herself being pulled into an empty room and she blinked rapidly, a little confused about what was going on. When had she become so invested in Kara Danvers' love life? And why did it hurt so badly that she was seeing someone when Lena spent the vast majority of her time completely infuriated with the other girl?

"Are you okay?" Jess asked quietly, dropping Lena's hand and taking a step back, knowing Lena wasn't a touchy person. 

"Sure, yeah," Lena shrugged. 

"Why don't you just tell her the truth, Lena?" 

"Jess, I can be friends with her without telling her I'm a lesbian. I'm fine," Lena snapped. 

"Oh, so now you want to be _friends_?" Jess snorted. 

"No? Yes? I don't know. She's a lot different than I thought she would be, but that doesn't mean I can go and out myself to everyone that I start to feel just a little bit comfortable with. You _know_ what would happen if it got out that I'm gay! Athletes at this school have never been particularly open-minded and I'm more comfortable tutoring her if she doesn't know. If it somehow got out, my mother would make me come home and I _cannot_ go home. One day I'll be ready to come out, but today is definitely not that day. Not to mention the fact that I couldn't handle sitting across from someone to tutor them knowing they're looking at me and judging me on my sexuality, and the last thing I need is to have to deal with being made fun of every day. Just--just _no_ ," Lena fussed, thought she wasn't completely sure if she was trying to convince herself or Jess of her reasons. 

"Okay, okay, I didn't mean to push, Lena," Jess said softly. "You know I support you completely, I just don't want to see you hurt again." 

"I know," Lena replied more calmly. 

Unbeknownst to either of the dark-haired women, though, a very wide-eyed Kara Danvers stood silently in the hallway, having heard Lena's whole rant after coming to apologize because she had seen the look of hurt on Lena's face before Jess had dragged her away. Without a sound, Kara backed away from the door and went back to find James, deciding she could sort this out any time that wasn't now.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while, taking finals online really took it out of me, but I'm back!

"Hey," Kara said cautiously as she sat down next to Lena the following Monday, but the raven-haired woman didn't respond. "You okay?"

"I'm sorry?" Lena replied flatly, pulling an earbud out so that she could hear the blonde, hoping that drawing attention to her headphones would clue Kara in on the fact that this was not the morning to talk to her. 

"I asked if you were okay?" Kara repeated and Lena's jaw tightened. There was that question again, and unfortunately it sent Lena in just as much of a tailspin this time as it had the first time she had asked it. 

"I'm fine." 

"Are you sure?" Kara questioned hesitantly, seeing the familiar, cold expression on Lena's face--the one that she thought she was finally breaking through. 

"Sure," Lena answered flatly as she put the earbud back in. And honestly, Lena wondered, what college sophomore didn't know what headphones meant? Were they not the universal sign for _speak at your own risk_? She had put up an auditory barrier for a reason, and she hoped that abruptly putting the headphones back in place would make that message a little more clear. 

It wasn't like she intended to avoid the bubbly blonde forever anyways, she just needed to shut her up until she could close her eyes without seeing Kara in that jersey. It was a crush, and one based purely off of physical attraction at that, it shouldn't take long to shake, right? Lena gave a breath of relief that Kara raised an eyebrow at when the professor began and shook her out of her own head. Lena ignored her.

* * *

"Hi," Kara said the next day as they waited on their classmates to fill in for microbiology. She frowned when she realized that once again, Lena had headphones in. "Lena?" she tried again, but the other woman was obviously ignoring her. Finally, she had had enough, and she pulled one of Lena's earbuds out on her own. 

" _Excuse me_?" Lena snapped, but Kara didn't back down. They both tried to ignore the fact that the outburst had turned several heads, and Lena was increasingly thankful that not many people were in the room yet. 

"What's wrong with you?" Kara asked genuinely. 

"Nothing, _damn._ What's wrong with you? You somehow forget that headphones are the universal sign for _back the fuck off_?" 

"I'm well aware of what the headphones are for, Lena, I just don't generally allow my friends to shut me out!" Kara hissed, and Lena was certain that she had never heard that kind of venom in the blonde's voice. 

"I'm not really in the mood to deal with little Miss Sunshine right now, thanks," Lena spat. 

"Oh forgive me for being a nice person," Kara fussed. 

Lena had fully intended to give the girl the cold shoulder until she gave up on her the way everyone else did, but when Kara looked at her with obvious hurt in those big blue eyes, everything inside of her just wanted to calm the blonde and reassure her. And whether or not Lena hated that that was her first reaction to seeing Kara hurt, that was exactly what she did. 

"I--look, I've had a really bad week and generally when I'm in a mood, everyone in my life just backs off, okay? I'm not used to someone being so damn persistent. I don't have anyone like that," Lena huffed. 

"What about Jess?" Kara asked gently, softening so quickly that Lena wondered if it was possible to get whiplash from someone's mood changes. 

"I love Jess, she's one of my best friends, but she and Jack--well, I think I've snapped at the one too many times for them to want to be close to me when I'm struggling," Lena admitted, and for the life of her, she couldn't figure out why she was admitting this to an almost stranger. Not that she hadn't spent countless hours wondering which outburst it had been that had finally caused her friends to keep her at an arm's length, but she had never intended to admit that to anyone else. "I don't like for people to see me upset." 

_Dammit, Luthor, pull yourself together. Stop being obsessively gay over this woman for two minutes and collect yourself._

"You deserve to have people in your life that will be there even when you're in a bad mood," Kara said sadly. "Even if your bad moods rival the destruction level of a category five hurricane." She gave Lena a little smile at the second line, hoping to lighten the mood. 

"I like having space," Lena shrugged. "Space allows me to calm down and deal with my feelings without hurting anyone around me." _Without showing weakness,_ she added silently.

"You'll only end up hurting yourself," Kara replied softly. 

"Well _that_ I am not worried about," Lena said more firmly as she turned back towards her book, and Kara knew better than to push anymore. 

* * *

The rest of the week came and went in more or less the same fashion--Lena hardly spoke to Jess and Jack and Kara slowly inched her way back into having regular conversations with her. Lena couldn't be blamed for that, though, at least that's what she told herself. If the blonde woman had the persistence of a child begging for a cookie, and they were forced to spend a significant amount of time together between classes and tutoring, that really wasn't Lena's fault. To be honest, Lena barely even noticed how quickly Kara had wormed her way back in until she was seeing the blonde smiling at her from in front of the lecture hall's entrance the next Monday morning and realized that the last time she had even spoken to a living person had been the Friday before. 

"Err--what are you doing out here?" Lena asked awkwardly, looking behind Kara to the door of the lecture hall where their chemistry class met. 

"I was wondering if you wanted to go get coffee?" Kara replied with a shrug. "You know, since we're both up entirely too early for the fact that our chemistry class was cancelled." 

"It was what?" Lena asked flatly. "You're kidding?" 

"Nope, there's a note on the whiteboard inside because apparently Mr. You-Shall-Not-Pass can't be bothered to email us so that we don't have to come onto campus in the pouring rain for a class that isn't meeting," Kara answered in a tone that Lena though might actually hold more snark and bitterness than she'd ever heard from the blonde. 

"Uh, you know, I think you might actually need that coffee now," Lena snorted. 

"I had a bad weekend," Kara grumbled. 

"Fight with your boy-toy?" Lena asked, unable to help herself for fishing for information about James. 

"My _what_?" Kara coughed, eyes going wide. 

"You know, big burly dude that came to save you from the party?" Lena questioned, unconvincingly feigning indifference. 

" _James_? Ew! No! No, no, no. Just no. We're not--James and I are just friends," Kara assured, making a gagging noise to convey her disgust with the entire idea of her and James being together. 

"Uh huh," Lena said with a nod that told Kara she wasn't buying it, "and all of your friends call you Dumplin'?"

"Unfortunately, yes," Kara groaned. "I _might_ have an unhealthy obsession with potstickers and I _might_ have gotten into a heated debate about whether potstickers and dumplings were the same thing with a guy while I was drunk last year. I'm generally pretty laid back, so my friends thought it was hilarious--hence the nickname." 

Lena tried valiantly to school her reaction, but still ended up snorting in a ver undignified way at the blonde's obvious irritation before giving up and full-on laughing at the story. 

"Lena!" Kara fussed. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! That's hilarious, Kara, you _know_ that's funny!" Lena giggled. 

"Oh my goodness, _the_ Lena Luthor is giggling like a child," Kara laughed, eyes wide in awe and surprise. "I've never seen you laugh like that. Fine, fine, it's funny, whatever." 

"Yeah, well, don't go and tell anyone. I'm not supposed to know how to smile," Lena retorted with an eye roll as they finally made it to the front of the line to order their coffee. 

Once they sat down at a table in a narrow hallway, mostly secluded from prying eyes, Lena realized how much she had relaxed since she had woken up that morning and caught herself genuinely smiling without meaning to. The action didn't go unnoticed by her companion, though. 

"You seem to be feeling better this week," Kara said with a soft smile, though she sounded cautious. 

"I--yeah, I guess I am. I think I just needed a little bit of time to recharge," Lena shrugged. 

"You have to spend a lot of time pretending to be someone you're not, don't you?" Kara asked, and though it hadn't been a reference to her being in the closet at all, Kara quickly added on when she saw how wide Lena's eyes went at the question. "I just mean it seems like you're expected to be calloused and collected and--and _professional_ all the time because of your last name, but you're what? Eighteen? No one your age is all of that all the time. I think I would need time to recharge if I were you too." 

"Yeah," Lena mumbled, giving her a sad smile. "Honestly? Sometimes I wonder if I even know who I am. So much of it is an act, it always has been. I wonder sometimes if even the parts that I think are real are actually real. You know someone got ahold of a picture of me when I was ten after my dad had bought me a hotdog at a street cart--I remember eating it because my mom had forgotten that I would be in her office that day and neglected to plan for me being there, so I hadn't eaten--anyways, this stupid click-bait article claimed that I had thrown a temper tantrum because hotdogs were my favorite food or something to that effect. I did remember throwing a fit because I was ten and hungry, so for about five years after that, when someone asked what my favorite food was, I said hotdogs, because why would they have said that if it weren't true? Long story short, at fifteen, I realized I fucking _hate_ hotdogs and the media is a bitch. I wonder sometimes what other things about myself I've just accepted because I've heard so many times." 

It wasn't until Lena looked back across the table to find the blonde giving her that blinding, mind-numbing smile that she realized she had just opened up far more to Kara than she had ever intended to--far more than she ever had with anyone else. She blushed fiercely at the realization and dropped her gaze towards her hands so that she didn't have to meet the blonde's eyes. 

"No, no, I totally get that, you don't have to be embarrassed. People expect me to be a lot different than I am because I'm an athlete, and though I don't care so much anymore, there was definitely a time where I let it define me. When people first meet me they usually expect me to be all touch and calloused and rigid and overly competitive, but I'm just not. I never have been. I can be tough and aggressive on the field, but that's just not me in real life. And for a long time I thought I had to pretend that was me for anyone to take me seriously as an athlete, but eventually I started to realize that my game could speak for itself and I've been slowly letting go of that. It's not the same situation, of course, but I understand what it feels like to wonder who you really are," Kara assured. 

"Yeah?" Lena asked with a smile. 

"You know I meant it when I had no expectations of you, right? And I'm not saying you need to let me in all the way because I can see just how tall those walls you've built up are, I know they won't come down easily. I'm just saying that I don't expect you to be anything you're not and if you want to relax a little--well, if you ever need a place where there are no expectations for you to act a certain way, I'm here." 

"I really appreciate that, but I'm not even sure I know how to do that," Lena admitted.

* * *

**"Hey, did you ever schedule that tutoring session with Leslie?" -Kara**

**"Nope. She swapped tutors. Apparently she wasn't comfortable being in a confined space with a Luthor or something like that. Really, she did me a favor, though, I didn't want to be stuck with someone like that all semester." -Lena**

**"Why?" -Lena**

**"Ah. She just made a comment about her tutor and I was deciding whether I needed to punch her or not." -Kara**

**"And you would or wouldn't need to if I was her tutor still?" -Lena**

**"Would. If it's someone else, I can settle for pegging her with the ball at practice tomorrow. If it was you, I'd need to hit her." -Kara**

**"Please don't go getting into fights over me, Kara, a lot of people say nasty things about my family, just ignore it." -Lena**

**"I couldn't care less what people say about your family. She was taking bets on whether she could get her tutor into bed." -Kara**

**"Also, wouldn't be the first time I fought with Leslie, don't worry about it. Wasn't you anyways." -Kara**

Lena would love to say that there weren't two halves of her at war over the conversation, but that would be a massive lie. One half, was reminding her that Kara was trying to stand up for her and keep her reputation in tact, while the other half of her was absolutely terrified over the fact that Kara had put any thought at all into her being in a relationship with another woman. Did Kara suspect that she was less-than-straight? Was that part of the reason Kara was willing to fight Leslie over something so stupid? Was it because she couldn't stand the thought of someone spreading a rumor that might make Lena look gay? Which part was so concerning to her?

* * *

"WhywereyousomadatLeslie?" Lena asked all in one breath the second Kara settled into the seat across from her for their tutoring session.

"Um. What?" Kara asked with a laugh. "English please?" 

"Why were you so mad at Leslie? When you thought the comment was about me?" Lena asked more calmly, refusing to wait another second to get an explanation to the question that had been plaguing her since the night before. 

"Oh. I just really hate it when people talk that way about sex without knowing how the other person feels. I couldn't care less about what she does in her free time, but whether or not she's been in bed with someone, she needs their consent before talking openly about it," Kara shrugged. "I--the guy I lost my virginity to went and opened his mouth about it not ten minutes after it happened and before I had even fully wrapped my brain around the fact that I'd finally been with someone in that way, I had fifteen texts and my teammates were calling me to ask what happened. I just think that before someone goes around talking about that stuff, they should at least consider how the other person would feel if it got out." 

"Oh," Lena mumbled. 

"Sorry, too much information," Kara muttered. 

"Not at all. Something similar happened to me, actually. Just maybe not on such a wide scale," Lena replied with a sad smile. "They--um--well, we weren't really together. Feelings were pretty one-sided, I was the one that wanted more. We were sleeping together and I guess I was hoping it would lead to more, but it--it didn't stay a secret from my friends for very long and that kind of hurt." 

She didn't know why she always admitted more than she had intended to the blonde, maybe it was just due to the fact that Kara made her feel safe and understood, but she really hoped the other woman didn't notice the way she was avoiding using pronouns to describe the person she was with. She hoped that it was ambiguous enough that Kara would assume she was talking about some boy though she was definitely not. 

"They shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry," Kara said with a sympathetic expression, and Lena only had a few seconds to panic over her choice of pronouns before her phone started buzzing and Kara turned her attention to her laptop to let Lena answer her texts. 

**"Luthorrrrr!!!" -Jack**

**"Uh oh." -Jess**

**"All good things!" -Jack**

**"Party tonight!" -Jack**

**"Come with us!" -Jack**

**"Please! Jess had a bad week! We can watch her get white girl wasted." -Jack**

**"Okay, first off, Lena is the only one of the three of us that's white and she can handle her liquor better than both of us combined. Second, FUCK YOU!" -Jess**

**"But yeah, no, I totally intend to get plastered, so please do come." -Jess**

**"I AM IN CLASS" -Lena**

**"Your class doesn't start for four more minutes. Come with? You can even bail early if it's lame." -Jack**

**"We miss you!" -Jess**

**"You didn't have to beg. A party sounds good. Meet at Jack's?" -Lena**

**"7?" -Jess**

**"Sounds good!" -Jack**

Lena sighed and tossed her phone into her book bag. She knew she'd been distant lately and the least she could do is go out with her friends, even if the prospect of being surrounded by people didn't sound like much fun right now. The raven-haired woman resigned herself to the idea anyways and started mentally cataloguing her wardrobe to decide on an outfit for the night.

* * *

By the time the trio made it to the frat house that was hosting the party, both Jack and Jess were slightly buzzed off of whiskey shots that they had taken before leaving, knowing that whatever alcohol was offered at the party would be weak and cheap. Lena rolled her eyes, she had drank more than Jack and weighed a considerable amount less than him, yet she was almost completely sober while he was already getting giggly. 

"At least he's a happy drunk," Jess shrugged, seeing the way Lena was eyeing him. 

"Oh yes, _you're_ my moody drunk," Lena laughed. "My little lightweights." 

"Babe, don't look now, but Morgan Edge is staring at your ass," Jess warned in a low voice, leaning in so that Lena and Jack were the only ones that could hear her. 

"Joy," Lena groaned. "Because _that's_ what I want to deal with tonight." 

"If you want to leave early, just let us know, okay?" Jack reminded. 

"Yeah, no, I'll be fine," Lena assured. "I'm going to get a drink, keep an eye on him, will you?" she gestured in Edge's direction with her eyes and Jess nodded. 

Really, Lena should have known better than to walk off by herself, because the second she went to turn back towards her friends, she was face-to-face with a smirking Morgan Edge. 

"Hi, sweetheart," he purred in a voice that she knew he must be forcing down an octave. 

"Please move, Edge," she groaned, moving to step around him. 

"Don't act like you don't like the attention," he scoffed. "No one wears a top that shows that much tit if they don't want attention." 

Lena sighed internally, she knew the shirt she was wearing was cut a little lower than she would have liked, but when she had bought it the year before, she hadn't had nearly as much to cover up. Though the raven-haired woman had never been _small_ in the chest, her body had definitely picked the last year to finish maturing, though she wasn't sure she could be surprised considering she was a year younger than everyone else in her class. 

"Well, much like every woman who's ever had your attention, Morgan, I am utterly disappointed," Lena snarled. 

"Come on, sweetheart, don't you want to dance?" he asked, moving to take Lena's cup from her to lead her to the dance floor. 

"I don't dance. _Leave me alone,_ " Lena hissed. When she finally pushed her way around him, he gave her a smug smirk that she couldn't quite place and let her pass. 

"Are you okay?" Jess asked, moving to put her body between the two. "I'm sorry, I didn't know what to do."

"It's not your fault he's a creep. At least he didn't touch me this time," Lena replied with a shrug. 

Regardless of how irritating he had been, Lena couldn't help but think that Edge had let her get away with less effort than usual and wondered what exactly he was thinking. She highly doubted that he was done tormenting her for the night, so she resolved to sticking close to her friends and cutting herself off after a few drinks. 

That was _before_ everything started to get blurry. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: this chapter will have a brief (not explicit) description of sexual assault that could have ended much worse if our Supergirl didn't come to the rescue. Check out the notes at the end of the chapter for what you missed if you don't want to read due to the trigger warning!

While walking home from a game night with her friends, Kara was less than surprised to find an excessive amount of drunk students wandering the campus since it did happen to be around midnight on a Friday. She and Winn often liked to find a table outside the 24-hour pizza place on campus and just people-watch, often making bets on which of the belligerent students would topple over or embarrass themselves first. Kara rarely won. This particular night, though, Kara caught sight of a small woman being guided by a man that was much larger than she was, and something about the interaction made the hair on her arms stand up. She subtly diverted her path so that she would walk past them to try to better assess the situation. 

The woman let out a cry that chilled Kara to the bone and she instantly sped up her pace after the man pushed the woman back into the side of a building. Kara clenched her teeth when the man's face came into view--Edge--and he was manhandling this poor woman. She couldn't see the woman due to the shadow he was casting on her, but everything about the situation felt deeply personal to Kara, and she couldn't help but feel connected to the woman--something about the way she moved and cowered and cried seemed so familiar to the blonde, and by the time she got close enough to make out the woman's face, she was full on jogging. 

" _Lena_?" Kara squeaked in shock when she saw her obviously drunken tutor pressed into the massive football player's side. The raven-haired woman only groaned in response and Kara realized how heavily she was relying on him to even stand up. 

"What the fuck do you want, Danvers?" Edge hissed, pulling Lena towards him in an attempt to make the interaction look mutual. 

"Let me take her home," Kara replied with a tone of warning in her voice. 

"Little Luthor is going home with me," Edge cackled. "Haven't you heard? We've been fooling around." 

"Like hell she is!" Kara snapped, suddenly seething. 

"What do you even care? Like you've ever hung out with someone who isn't a jock, you've probably never spoken to her!" Edge laughed. 

"Like you have either!" Kara hissed. 

"We don't have to be friends to have a one night stand," he sneered. 

"She's in no state to consent to a one-night _anything_ and you know that!" Kara yelled. 

"She _likes_ it," he said in a low voice, reaching over to forcefully grope one of Lena's ample breasts. The raven-haired woman quietly whined in response, leaning more heavily into him for support. 

"Did you do that to her?" Kara demanded, pointing to the massive hickey on Lena's neck that became abundantly visible when the smaller woman rolled her head to the side. 

"Little slut moaned the whole time," he taunted with a grin. 

"I--to go home," Lena slurred, some of the words completely lost and the rest barely decipherable. 

"Don't worry, I'll take you home," Edge cooed, positioning himself behind her so that he could reach around to forcefully squeeze at her breasts in a way that made even Kara squirm in pain. Lena cried out at the contact and he just smirked, "she's going to be loud in bed, I already know it." 

"Edge, give her to me now or I'm calling the cops," Kara hissed. 

When Kara reached out for the hand that Lena was stretching towards her in a silent plea to get this barbarian's hands away from her now very sensitive breasts, Edge yanked the woman away from the blonde with an arm around her stomach, causing Lena to heave. Edge jerked away with a sound of disgust, knowing she was about to throw up. Kara winced as she shorter woman doubled over and vomit splattered on the ground in front of her, marring her pants with tiny spots. 

"You can fucking have her, Danvers," Edge spat, tossing the heels he had been carrying at Kara's feet. "Even those tits aren't worth that mess." 

"Oh Lena..." Kara breathed when she heard the quiet sobs that were mixed with her gagging.

* * *

When Lena finally opened her eyes, pure panic washed over her between the sight of an unfamiliar bedroom and the complete lack of memory of the night before. The splitting headache didn't even register to her until she felt herself jerk fiercely with a sob at the realization that her breasts were violently sore, meaning she had been touched somehow the night before. 

"Hey, hey," Kara soothed, running back towards the bed from her bathroom. "It's me, you're safe. This is my bed, you're okay." 

Though the realization that she was in a familiar woman's bed should have calmed her a little, Lena found herself sobbing even harder, a mixture of relief, embarrassment, and another type of fear flooding her foggy mind. 

"I know you're probably pretty sore right now, but if you're worried that things went too far--well, you were dressed when I found you, at the very least," Kara tried hopelessly to assure her. 

"These aren't my--my clothes," Lena said through tears, head throbbing with every word. 

"No, no, sorry, those are mine. You threw up, so I got you into something clean. You were definitely wearing your own clothes when I found you. Morgan Edge was trying to get you back to his room, but you never made it there," Kara promised. 

"You--you undressed--me?" Lena choked out, and though she was relieved, it sounded a lot like anger to the blonde. 

"I--I'm sorry, I didn't mean to overstep, I just--" Kara blanched, but Lena cut her off. 

"No! I'm--thank you, I was--worried it was--someone else," Lena sobbed. 

"Here, sit up and take this aspirin and drink the gatorade, please. You--you threw up a lot..." Kara urged, unsure of where the line was right now. 

"I never--I never puke when--when I'm drunk--I didn't even--drink that much," Lena cried, tears slowing but not stopping. 

"Yeah, you--Lena, you were drugged. You didn't look like you were just drunk last night and it didn't look like it was done on accident. I didn't see you until you were on your way to Edge's from the party, but I knew you'd never agree to go home with him sober, so I stopped you," Kara explained, chewing on her lip. 

"How--how did you know?" Lena asked, pulling herself up t finally take the aspirin and start on the gatorade. 

"Lena, I--I know you're a lesbian. You don't need to hide that from me. I stopped it because I knew you wouldn't have been trying to go home with a guy if you were sober," Kara admitted. 

"Even drunk I wouldn't go home with a guy," Lena grumbled. "How did you find out?"

"I overheard you talking to Jess," Kara confessed. "I know you didn't want me to know because you were scared that I would make fun of you or let it out to the press before you were ready to come out. I figured you'd tell me when you were ready, but I promise I would never tell anyone or make fun of you. I--Lena, _no one_ here knows this-- no one _at all_ knows aside from my sister, but I--I'm bi."

"Oh..." Lena mumbled, stunned not only by the fact that someone knew about her sexuality, but also by Kara's confession. "Sorry, I just--a lot to process and my head is kind of spinning." 

"It's okay," Kara assured with a laugh. "It actually feels really good to admit that to someone." 

"Why--why aren't you out? I mean I have to worry about press and my family's image and all of that, but you--why?" Lena asked softly. 

"The soccer team pretty much has a 'don't ask, don't tell' policy. I guess it's awkward for straight women to know there's a girl in the locker room that might be attracted to one of them, which I get. When we spend so much time together and are forced to be touchy and half-naked in front of each other so often, it makes sense. Honestly, if I'd ever been attracted to anyone on my team, I'd probably feel weird about it too. I guess I just figure it would make my life a lot easier to not have to deal with it until I've graduated," Kara shrugged. 

"I'm sorry, I'm not--I didn't mean to judge, I just--I suppose I really wish I had an option. I'm glad you do. Have--have an option, I mean," Lena mumbled. "I'm sorry, I'm not good at this."

"At what?" Kara asked with a sympathetic laugh. 

"Having friends," Lena shrugged. 

"You have friends, Lena," Kara reminded.

"Not--not like this. It's not--stop looking at me like that, I don't want to be pitied. I have friends and they're important to me, but we don't really talk about the tings that matter. Not friends that realized I was gone last night," Lena mumbled, refusing to meet Kara's eyes. 

"Yeah, well considering you're the only person I've told about my sexuality, what does that say about my friends, then?" Kara replied, knowing by now exactly how she needed to respond to Lena to keep her from shutting down. The blonde turned herself around and leaned back against the headboard beside Lena, pushing the gatorade bottle into her hands again. "Now drink it." 

Kara took it as a slight victory when Lena silently took the bottle and began working on finishing it without pushing her away or snapping at her for realizing they had just had a meaningful conversation. Lena, though, was far too lost in her thoughts to care that the blonde had completely disregarded her need for solitude. 

"I need you to tell me what he did to me. What you know, at least," Lena said finally, and Kara could see the way she was cradling her chest in her arms delicately and protectively. 

"You're sore, aren't you?" Kara asked softly. Seeing the raven-haired woman's slumped posture only reminding her of the way Morgan Edge had been groping her the night before. 

"Yes," Lena admitted in a softer voice than Kara had ever heard her use. 

"He was groping you _really_ hard. You also have an alarmingly large hickey on your neck, but that was already there before I found you, so I can't actually promise you he's the one that did that. It--it looked like he was grabbing at you between your legs when I was walking up too, but he had you pushed against a wall before I got there, so I--I don't know for sure. When I confronted him, he made a show of getting behind you and--well, being forceful with your chest--I wouldn't be surprised if you have bruises when you go to undress, if I were you," Kara recalled carefully. "I'm really sorry, Lena, I wish I'd found you sooner." 

By the time Kara finished, Lena had tears streaming down her face again, and without thinking, Kara wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close. Lena instantly went stiff, brain halting for the first time that morning as she realized that she was simultaneously terrified of being touched and completely starved for it, which just made her sob harder. 

"It's okay, it's okay, you're safe now," Kara soothed, holding the other woman tightly. 

"He--he could've--" Lena cried, fisting her hands in Kara's shirt, seemingly without her own permission. 

"But he didn't," Kara reminded gently. "He didn't get you home and you're going to be okay." 

"I'm sorry I'm such a mess," Lena sobbed, realizing just how un-Luthor-like she was being, not to mention the fact that she didn't think she'd ever broken down like this in her life and _why_ did the one time have to be in front of the girl she'd been crushing on all semester?

"I have a feeling you don't let it out very often," Kara said with a sympathetic laugh, "it's okay to be overwhelmed, you know? It's okay to cry and to need to be held."

"I've--I've never been held like this before," Lena mumbled through a fit of sniffles, because apparently this was embarrass-yourself-in-front-of-beautiful-women day. 

"What do you mean?" Kara laughed. "Everyone needs to be held sometimes, that's only human." 

"No, I--it's nothing," she started before abruptly correcting herself. Lena realized in that moment that this kind of contact was probably something that Kara relied on to make it through her day-to-day life, that Kara had likely grown up being held like this by her parents and sister, and now that she was older, she probably allowed her boyfriends and friends to do this for her too--she was all of the sudden hit with the reality that Kara _had_ other friends and people that she craved attention from, people that would be there when she needed help. Kara had all of that, Lena did not. 

"It's not nothing if it's making you shake like this," Kara argued softly, and Lena hadn't even realized the way she was trembling in the blonde's arms. 

"I just--" Lena started, willing an excuse to come to her in the moment, but the second Kara pulled back and blue eyes met her own, the truth came tumbling out anyways. "No one wants to touch a Luthor with a ten foot pole, Kara. I do care about my friends, but even they are acutely aware of my family history, and they're not touchy people anyways. I don't--my mother has never been particularly loving, and I honestly don't think anyone has touched me at all since my brother went crazy aside from in like a sexual way. I don't--I don't do relationships, being held isn't really an option." 

"Well," Kara said, and it took everything in her to not cry or gasp or pull Lena in tighter, at the very least, "it's an option now. I don't care what your last name is. I don't care what your family did, you aren't them." 

"That's easy to say coming from a Danvers," Lena snorted, but instantly chided herself, she knew the wall of sarcasm and defensiveness between her and Kara needed to come down now. 

"I'm adopted," Kara said softly. "My family died in a fire when I was twelve."

"Oh, Kara, I'm--I shouldn't have said that," Lena blanched, moving to pull away, but Kara didn't let go.

"It's okay, I'm not upset," Kara assured, and Lena allowed herself to sink back into the blonde's side. "My mom was a judge and I--I don't know that I agree with some of her rulings now that I'm older, to be honest. I think maybe she put a lot of people away for a long time when they were only doing what they had to to keep their family alive. And my dad was some kind of medical researcher, I'm not sure I agree with all of his practices either." 

"You are far too good for this world, Kara Danvers," Lena said softly. 

"I told you from the beginning how this friendship was going to work," Kara shrugged. "We don't expect anything out of each other. You can just be Lena, you don't have to be a Luthor, all I expect out of you is for you to be yourself around me and to let me in at your own pace--nothing else." 

"I can do that," Lena nodded, "I think."

"You can," Kara encouraged.

"You know you can be yourself with me too, right? Even if that is a bi disaster who isn't ready to come out to anyone else," Lena added quickly, needing Kara to know this wasn't one sided. 

Somewhere deep inside of her mind, Lena was yelling at herself _she's too close, she knows too much, what are you doing?_ She shrugged it off quickly, though, because Kara was _holding_ her. The woman she'd been fawning over for months was actually holding her and telling her she could be herself, and she couldn't let herself think about it too much right now or this would be too overwhelming for her. 

"You're thinking too loudly," Kara said groggily. 

"Kara," Lena said carefully, pieces finally clicking into place for her, "did you not sleep last night?"

"What? No, yeah, I did," Kara mumbled, unsuccessfully feigning a laugh. 

"Uh huh, and then why is this the only side of the bed with the sheets turned down? And why were you up out of bed already when I woke up even though it's still early? And already dressed at that. Not to mention the fact that you're yawning and look like you've forced yourself to stay awake all night." 

"Okay, fine. Maybe I was a tiny bit worried that you'd throw up again and aspirate," Kara mumbled. "And maybe I was a little worried about invading your personal space. Which I realize I threw out the window this morning."

"You should really get some rest," Lena urged. "Don't you usually run on Saturday mornings?"

"Yeah, but I can go later instead. I didn't want you to wake up without me here. If it had been me, I know I would have panicked had I woken up somewhere unfamiliar. Especially while unable to remember what had happened," Kara shrugged. 

"You didn't have to do that, but I _really_ appreciate it. I seriously would have panicked if you hadn't been here to tell me what happened," Lena replied, giving Kara a small but honest smile. 

"Please finish that gatorade," Kara requested again. "I don't care if it's too sweet for your fancy taste, you threw up and it replaces electrolytes." 

"Yes ma'am," Lena snorted. 

"You do realize you're older than me?" Kara laughed. 

" _What_? No I'm not! I'm a year ahead!" Lena fussed. 

"Yeah, but I'm two years ahead," Kara replied with a raised brow that threatened Lena to challenge her.

"Holy fuck," Lena mumbled. 

"Well, technically, I skipped a grade after I was adopted so that I'd have some classes with my adoptive sister, but I was already ahead because where I was born, the age requirements were different. My birthday is in September, and in the state where I started school, the cut off was at the end of September, but here, it's August, meaning I wouldn't have made the cut off to start a year early had I lived here already," Kara explained. 

"So you just skipped a grade? Just like that?" Lena asked incredulously. 

"I mean I transferred from a private school that was for the gifted to a public school, so yes," Kara laughed. "I don't actually admit that to people though. Being an athlete and a nerd don't usually go all that well together." 

"I'm learning a lot about you today, Danvers," Lena smirked. "Next I'm going to learn that deep down you're a total dork. It'll be Harry Potter, Star Wars, all of it."

"What gave me away?" Kara groaned. "Also, I would vastly prefer if you didn't call me Danvers. Everyone on the team does and that's--I mean, that's my sister, you know? Makes me miss her."

"You have a pair of pajama pants over there with the Deathly Hallows symbol on them. Star Wars was just a guess, though," Lena shrugged. 

"So what I'm hearing is that you're a closeted nerd too? If you recognized the Deathly Hallows symbol enough to call it by its name, you must be," Kara snorted. 

"Oh darling, my inner nerd is _not_ the part of myself I keep closeted," Lena teased, and Kara threw her head back with an unfiltered laugh. Lena looked up at the blonde and had to remind herself to breathe; not only was Kara undeniably beautiful, but Lena didn't think she herself had ever laughed so freely. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone that doesn't want to read due to the trigger warning, just know that in this chapter, Kara saves Lena from being taken back to Edge's place after being drugged at a party. Lena finally starts to let down her walls and she and Kara start to bond after Kara admits that she knows Lena is gay and comes out to Lena as bi.

**Author's Note:**

> I know this starts out pretty slowly, but it will definitely start to move more quickly pretty soon. I hope you stick around!


End file.
